Blog The Edited Version - dedicated to Stephen Baily, aka The Chief

I've had a request for an edited blog, as my boss has the attention span of a warthog and the temerity of a diva. For my regular readers, you know I'm not an edited version kind of girl, in every sense I'm all or nothing, it comes with being a purist, don't you know. But here goes.

Got to LA, got lost there, found ourselves, saw some stuff to do with films. Got scared. Left with the saccharin taste of Hollywood on my lips.

Went to San Diego, saw animals at the zoo. Liked the orangutans best, reminded me of life at the council: everyone sits around staring and you get peanuts for your labour. Saw a few big fish. Left worrying about big fish exploitation.
Went to Santa Barbara. Saw a lot of art, didn't know much about it but knew what I liked. Saw a lizard. Left without seeing Jimmy Cagney once, later found out this was because he's dead.

Went to San Simeon, saw the stars, re-discovered my spiritual centre and still small voice of calm. Saw a meglomaniac's castle. Left with a rosebud between my teeth.

Drove the Pacific Highway. Got scared of the cliffs. Left quickly with eyes shut but good memories of the view and the sense of freedom.

Arrived San Francisco. Loved it. Discovered a dream to work for a paper there where I could work for someone who wants to read everything I write. Imagine that. Saw a big prison on a big piece of stone. Left with a flower in my hair.

Arrived in NY. Luggage lost. Luggage found. Went to the top of a big tower, saw a few bridges, ate a lot of food. Still there, waiting for a big gorilla with a passion for blondes.

Lovely Sally and Steve, if you're still reading, sorry about the lack of pictures of good looking men. I'm into geeky weirdos when I'm not off men entirely (which is most of the time, to be fair, but to give you an idea, past crushes include Inspector Morse, Cracker and William H. Macy) so not willing to subject you to that, though did fall in love with the sweetest little medical nerd at an exhibition of polymerised (no, it's not a real word, I just made it up) cadavers. He had these sweet little glasses and everything. Here's a picture of Matthew McConaughey to make up for it.

CONGRATULATIONS MISS C ON YOUR FABULOUSLY EXCITING WRITE-UP IN THE PUBLISHER! YOU'RE AMAZING!!